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I recently discovered numerous email messages between our 13-year-old daughter and what sounds like an adult male! The emails have a flirty tone…she hasn’t mentioned that she has a boyfriend. I don’t know how she knows this man, could she have met him online?
We’ve banned chat rooms in our house… what else should I do?
Should we get rid of the computer?
Should I phone the police?
Could he be a paedophile?

We realised that if we banned chat rooms in our home or even got rid of the computer, our 11-year-old twins would use them elsewhere.
It’s better to talk to your daughter and discuss the facts about what can go on.
We went onto www.chatdanger.com together and read what happened to one girl. Once we talked to them openly about chat rooms and explained the pitfalls, they understood what could happen to them.
We always try and be around when they use the computer so we know pretty much where they go and who they talk to. Just like we do in the real world.

She could have met him online. He could be a paedophile. They do make contact with children this way.
I’d sit down and talk to your daughter right away. The anonymity of the Internet makes it the perfect place for disguises and deception. This man could be anybody.
Find out where she first met him and how they’ve been communicating, and if he’s sent her anything else.
It could be that she’s got herself into a situation where she’s out of her depth. If you are suspicious about this relationship, it may be appropriate to contact the police.

You should be concerned. My 12-year-old son had a chat room friend and they started to email each other. Then the guy started texting messages to his mobile phone asking him if they could meet up. We arranged to go along as Josh was determined to meet up with him. It turned out that he was a lot older and not the person Josh was expecting.
He’s now a lot more careful about his online friendships and who he gives personal information to.

At 15, my son’s a real Internet whiz kid, and knows more than I do. He tells me that he’s become great friends with loads of people he’s met online.
If he wanted to meet up with someone, I wouldn’t prevent him. But I would go along with him to their first meeting to make sure that they were who they said they were.
And he’s ok with that… he’s always advising his friends about what to do online, and I know that he tells them to be careful about strangers.
Sometimes kids listen more to their mates than they do to their parents.

I would be beside myself in your situation. I don’t want my 14-year-old daughter to meet anonymous men of any age on the Internet.
Mina likes to talk to children from other countries online but I’ve made her aware that she should always behave in a chat room the way we expect her to behave at home.
We’ve installed monitoring and filtering software so that we can keep track of everything that is happening online.